big bad carrie?

I’m not a mean person. I think that anyone who reads this blog probably knows that. If anything, I am too sensitive and emotional. But mean is just not an adjective that people regularly use for me.

Last night, though, may have changed that in some people’s minds, and honestly I don’t care. There are certain things that I am very stubborn about, and one of them is being carried up and down stairs. I don’t like it. It’s no secret. A few stairs is doable, 50 stairs. 50 stairs? No. HELL no. I don’t care if I only weigh 105 and can be carried easily or whatever.

I went to Nicol and Bobby’s wedding reception, knowing that I’d only be staying for a few minutes because the party was on the third floor of the venue. I just wanted to stop in, say hi and congratulations, and leave. I have known these people–and most of the guests–since early childhood, but still, I wouldn’t consider them my closest group of friends. In fact, I probably get along with them the least because I have known them for so long. I know all the things that annoy me about them.

Well, anyway, around 15-20 guys were all trying to convince me to get carried up these 2 flights of carpeted stairs. I knew it wasn’t going to happen, and the more they asked, the madder I became. Finally, I had to get snappy and tell them that they were pissing me off. I used more choice words and definitely a mean tone, but I got the point across. I just don’t like being asked again and again the same thing because somehow they are convinced I’ll change my mind. No, it wasn’t going to happen. I wasn’t going to be stranded on the third floor of this bar while everyone who carried me up was getting too drunk to carry me back down. I’m paralyzed, not dumb. Plus, stairs just scare me–obviously a part of my control issue.

Finally, Darcy came down and rescued me from the morons. I know the guys all think I was being a bitch, and it doesn’t matter to me what they think. They aren’t in my position.

I don’t like not being listened to. I know they were just trying to convince me to come up and have a good time too, but when I said no after about the 20th time, you would think they could catch the drift that I wasn’t budging on the issue.

Also, I’ve been in the process, I’ve realized, where I notice my friends I thought were so great really aren’t so great after all. I could give you a list of people I now see full of selfishness, but the list of people who don’t have that is much shorter. It’s a little sad to see people I once cared about show their true colors and lose my respect.

I think I am retreating again, into my hermit stage, and just going to stay home on my weekends or hang out with Maria, the one person who i have learned I can truly count on for everything. And at least she knows I’m not mean.


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2 Comments to “big bad carrie?”

  1. No, not the hermit stage!!!

    I know you’re not mean, too, cause I’ve been reading you every single day for a year and a half; you just get like anyone else when pushed. I don’t think those guys were fully comprehending the situation.

    You’re as sweet as cherry pie to me. : )

  2. Sounds like they were a bit arrogant perhaps. Thinking they knew better than you what was best. To hell with em!

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