Archive for April, 2011

April 30, 2011

smile!

Yes, Lindsay and Todd are going to have another baby! (Which means I am going to be a great aunt TWICE–and that makes me feel old.) She’s fairly early in the pregnancy and should be due in November. The first November baby in our family.

They are excited, and the rest of us aren’t too surprised. They’re such good little parents and wanted another one sometime soon anyway. Let’s just cross our fingers for a girl! :)

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April 29, 2011

search.

together we looked for rocks
along the bank
of that clear creek
on a humid summer day
and you swore up and down
that we’d never find a perfect one,
round and smooth
soft enough to sink our teeth into
and grey as a thunderstorm.

we rested our heads afterward in the grass,
empty-handed and disappointed,
and gave the day some thought.
maybe you were right, I said,
even though I really didn’t think
that you were.

it had never been this way before.

we agreed to try again
the next afternoon
but I found my rock that day
and he was you.

April 28, 2011

it’s not just type.

I go into a project, any project really, knowing that the people who see it and read it probably won’t care at all about the design or the paper or the craftiness. Those things won’t cross their mind twice before they toss whatever it is into a pile on their table or straight in the trash. I could use a Sharpie and index cards for an invitation for all they care.

Maybe the design isn’t important to them, but it is to me. Even if it’s simple (which I tend to like more anyway) and uses text only.

That will be my plan for the family reunion invitations. Simple, text, straight to the point. I’m printing them on A7 flat cards from Paper Source in paper bag color and using Paper source envelopes in red. With my new HP Photosmart Premium printer. That thing is heaven with ink, I swear. It is going to make this project easy peasy, I hope. I still have to finish up the back, but there’s plenty of time for that.

April 27, 2011

back to normal programming.

Yesterday wasn’t a particularly hard day like I had half-anticipated. In fact, it was much like any other Tuesday. I was busy at work with scripts and videos and meetings, and I was exhausted by the time 2 o’clock rolled around.

I think that worrying so much about the anniversary of my wreck had me so stressed and pre-occupied over the last few weeks, I didn’t really recognize the stress at all. I never know exactly how I will feel on April 26 of each year, and that uncertainty makes me question the importance of the day. Maybe I make too big of a deal of it, you know? Maybe I put too much importance on it and should brush it off.

Either way, I am glad it is over, and life can resume to normal for another year.

April 26, 2011

affirmation for my eighth year.


I am strong enough to handle it for another year.

Even when I doubt myself,
I am strong.

That part I can never let myself forget,
even when it would be easy to.

Onto year number eight.

Let’s get it!

April 23, 2011

cardboard love.

Have you seen this project?  It’s adorable and sweet and intriguing. I don’t remember where I found it. Maybe Pinterest or someone’s blog?  Either way I am glad I found it, and that I have spent the last 3 hours looking through the adorable little messages.

April 22, 2011

minolta purge.

I got the Minolta pictures back yesterday, and even though I still have a lot of learning to do with regular SLR cameras, I am in love with the way film comes out. Beautiful and slightly grainy. It seems more real because film is so tangible. Digital is just….digital. I got a bit of giddiness back when I saw the prints.

And in black and white too! Most of these were taken at Tim’s house and farm.









April 21, 2011

thoughts.

+ New printer works like a champ. I am excited to make the kids’ birthday invites and family reunion invites now. I was so far past due for an upgrade.

+ I am really bad at being sick. It makes me emotional, and I cry almost every time. I hate it.

+ A trip to KC is in the future. Soon. I miss my buds.

+ I love looking through old photos, even the ones of times that weren’t so fun (rehab). It’s nice to go back sometimes. And it’s more fun to post them on Facebook and tag every single name so all their friends can se how much of a nerd they were.

+ My friend’s baby died, and he was 2 years old and looked like a little angel porcelain doll in his tiny white coffin. Pretty little lips and long eyelashes. So, so sad.

+ The Book Thief is done and read. Great book. A few parts are slow, but I mostly love the point-of-view. Definitely recommend.

+ I used to be good at babysitting. Lately, I have no patience for the screaming. I’d rather they just want to watch movies.

+ New blog design = refreshing. A change is so nice sometimes.

+ Slipped and cut my forearm open on my mirror stand. I think the only good thing is that it’s a part of my arm that I can’t stand. Uck, makes me queasy.

+ First trip to Subtropix, Mike and Debbie’s new sub shop.  Sooo good!  I think that having a good sub shop so close to home will be a really good thing or a really bad thing!

April 20, 2011

washed away.

The memories that wondered
in between, in and out
from behind our chapped lips
left only lonely ghosts.

And we left with
little more than we came

except for crazy eyes.

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April 19, 2011

red and blue.

Awesomeness in red and blue.

I don’t think I could have expected my NikeID shoes to come out so completely gorgeous. The picture doesn’t do them justice at all. They were slightly expensive for a pair of shoes, but it’s not like they’re going to be worn out any time soon. They’ll probably never hit the ground in fact. Heh. I suppose that is one advantage of being a wheelchair user.

Ah, I love my Jayhawks.

April 17, 2011

baby face

April 16, 2011

new look.

I changed things around, if you can’t tell. I know some of you read this on Google Reader and probably noticed nothing different. That’s fine because I read my subscribed blogs on Reader too.

The yellow was just boring for me. I needed some color and design and chevron (my own version, of course).

Hope you all like it!

April 16, 2011

uncle art’s poem.

Never let it be said that dark days
always follow a casted shadow.
A dark day comes with past memories
that are sad or bad. A gloomy
relationship may cause a dark day.
To be saddened with tears over lost
dreams or desires may cause dark days
or depressed feelings. Searching but
never finding the true faith or
meaning of one’s self or being
through religion or prayer may leave
a person frustrated or withdrawn
with periods of dark days.

–Arthur Williams

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April 15, 2011

donnie and i.

April 14, 2011

ear infection: I am not a fan.

No sir, I am not.

I noticed my ear ached a few weeks ago, and then there were a few times that it was horrible. I almost cried because it felt like something in my ear was exploding after I got off the phone (at work, imagine that). But it’s been okay for about a week. I figured I just got some wind in it or something this past weekend at the pond.

I was wrong.

I went to the doctor earlier because I just haven’t felt too good all week. Tired (beyond normal, for sure) and pissy and just all-around crappy. My doc barely looked in my ear for a second before saying “No wonder your ears hurt!” I don’t know what ear infection looks like, but it must have been bad.

Now, antibiotics and my Kindle are my friends. I am going to finish The Book Thief before the weekend (because I am not going to work to suffer tomorrow). I think that’s probably the only good thing out of this.

April 13, 2011

oh yes, I did!


I bought a Minolta X-370 off of Craigslist last week and have been adjusting to the film SLR from a DSLR. I have barely touched a film camera since high school (10 years almost!) and was a little bit intimidated by it. I’m so accustomed to looking at my photos right away and deleting the ugly ones. Film is an entirely different route. All the careful adjustments, and making sure that each print won’t come out just a big blob of nothing. It’s fun and making me practice more patience, which DSLR had ripped away from me. I haven’t quite finished the first roll of film but, I’m sure I’ll post some when they come back.

p.s. I’m going to cross the “buy a new DSLR” goal off my 25 list. This sort of completes it for me. I am willing to wait on another digital for now.

April 12, 2011

thoughts.

+ I don’t think many of my real life friends read my blog. Maybe one or so. My sister does sometimes, when she needs a good cry. My uncle Danny. That’s all I can think of. The rest of you are my blog internet buddies, and that’s just fine with me.

+ Spent Saturday at my brother’s farm. They cleaned chickens all day, and we drank beer at the pond that night. It was probably the best Saturday I have had in quite a long time.

+ An old friend’s baby is in the hospital (with a grave prognosis) due to someone’s pure damn stupidity and ignorance. I won’t even get into it because it pisses me off so bad. It makes me wonder what happens in people’s heads sometimes!

+ My mom found the book with my uncle Art’s poems. It’s musty and looks like it was typed on a typewriter, and I love it. I think he would have been proud that I sort of am like him in ways.

+ Kid Rock’s “Rock On” from his new cd is my newest favorite song. So pretty.

+ I’m almost done with The Book Thief. It’s a good book, but it sort of feels like a chore completing it. I don’t think I am going to complete my goal of 15 books by August either. I just don’t have time.

+ I have been going to work with almost no makeup on at all, and it’s sort of liberating. I don’t need all that junk on my face. And I don’t need to impress anyone either.

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April 11, 2011

anyway.


I am not the most beautiful
or most pleasing
or the easiest to always get along with.

I am not always right
or agreeable
or have the patient temper.

I am probably not the best at anything,

but you love me anyway
and that makes me feel pretty damn great.

April 10, 2011

heh.

Even then I looked like I had a smartass smirk.

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April 9, 2011

such riches.


She never tried to taint his heart
made of a godly kind of gold,
sparkling in glints,
like the heat of the sun
on the single brightest afternoon.
No, she didn’t want to change its color.

She only wanted a piece for herself
to carry in her thin pocket
so maybe she could finally
be worth something too.

April 8, 2011

busy busy.


Forgive me if I am a bit scarce around here, or if I post more pictures than words.

The days of the week seem to go by so slowly at work, and so fast as soon as I leave the Innovia parking lot. I dislike that part of my day. The fast.

I have managed to make my way through my Google Reader every night, and even a few pages of The Book Thief. I’m almost done, and I plan on re-reading Water with Elephants before the movie is released in a few weeks. It’s definitely a book worth reading again.

A wink or two of sleep in between sounds good too.

April 7, 2011

30 days of lists wrap up.

This was a fun little project. Something that barely took 5 minutes of my time after work each day, making it easy to keep up with and easy to finish.

I used transparencies for each page and then a colored page of cardstock underneath to set it off. If you don’t look closely, it looks as if the words are actually written on the colored paper.

Below are a few of my pages. I doubt you want to see all 30. You might get bored.



April 6, 2011

sissy.

when your heart feels weak
and bruised from his heavy footsteps
like it might never recover
from such a hard hit hurting,
I am here
to hold you when you cry
and make you laugh when you don’t.

if we could have seen into the future,
we never would have gone ahead
and loved the men we did.
maybe then we wouldn’t want
what we do.

if there is one thing I know,
you’ll smile again.
you’ve always been good at that.

April 5, 2011

A new kind of sketch.


As in blueprints. House plans. Layouts of rooms.

I have been ready to move for a while. I wrote a year or so ago about a townhome that I was going to get. That didn’t happen, mainly because I was apprehensive and too chicken to admit it. Plus I didn’t have a job.

This year is different, with a whole different set of plans. I want to build a house. My brother first brought up the idea, considering buying a house and modifying it would still leave me a little empty. He knows me and my “I-want-it-this-way” type of thing about interiors/interior design. I was like “No way!” at first, but as time goes on and houses I have looked at on the market are out of the question, the idea sounds better and better. It will be a one-level berm home. No need for a basement (super good idea for a handicapped person) and cheaper on heating/cooling.

(Plus my dad just can’t stay in this house. Most people with emphysema can’t handle dust/pollen/etc., and my dad is no different. I’m moving, and I’m taking my parents with me.)

I am planning on skylights (this makes me heart flutter!) and bright walls (think yellow/white for the office) and open spaces. A few years ago, we took a vacation to Branson, and the condo we stayed at was open and airy and beautiful. I want my home to feel that way too.

More on this as plans develop. :)

April 3, 2011

ready for summer.