Archive for September, 2011

September 30, 2011


Of all time.

So beautiful I can’t even say anything else about it.

September 27, 2011


It’s just me
and the frustrations
and the decision
to push past
and get the day
started off

Just me
and the promise I
intend on keeping
to myself.

September 25, 2011


+ Lewis Black was awesome on Friday night. I haven’t laughed so hard in a long time.

+ Tangled is such a cute movie. Funny and sarcastic and sweet for a kiddie movie.

+ I am looking forward to a quiet(er) week. I have been really stressed about the land and some other things. It will be nice to just chill out and breathe.

+ Cooler weather means hoodies and scarves and hot cider drinks. As much as I love summer (and tank tops), I love the coziness of fall. It’s just winter that I dread.

+ I am going to start carrying my camera everywhere again. I need that part of me back again.

+ Fantasy football = awesome. My Jamaal Charles is out with a torn ACL, but I am still doing well. It might be early to gloat, but I am the only girl in our league and am sitting on top. So I can gloat a little. :)

September 24, 2011

big firsts.

+ Tink lost her first baby tooth (actually the dentist just went ahead and pulled it because it was loose anyway). I think she was proud that she bled without crying. Tough kid. The least of her worries is a silly little tooth.

+ I got my own loan, with my own credit, based on my own income, and I BOUGHT MY FIRST PIECE OF LAND. Probably the last piece of land I’ll ever buy too. By this time next year, I should be blogging about a new home. keep your fingers crossed for me.

September 20, 2011

waking with you.

Your face peeked
from beneath the cover,
like you were saving yourself
from drowning.
Blue cover, greying hair, scruffy cheeks,
my heart.

That’s what I saw
in the morning light.

My whole heart,
right there, laid out wide.

September 18, 2011

upon a star.

+ I wish things were always as easy as people looking in from the outside see them as.
+ I wish I didn’t feel like I have to make them look easy.
+ I wish I could wrap up the suffering and take their troubles away.
+ I wish empathy had an off switch.
+ I wish I put half as much effort into being vulnerable as I do into proving that I am tough.
+ I wish I wasn’t cold almost all the time. It’s exhausting.
+ I wish dogs didn’t stink so I would have no other reason to not have one.

September 15, 2011

near miss.

Crazy is how just about the whole week has gone.

But I didn’t crash in either instance.

I love that my co-workers can laugh and joke with me this way. Dave and I both almost had heart attacks when I almost ran him over, and then the shift lead operator brought this to me later…

September 14, 2011

there you are!

Meet John.

John is one of my favorite people EVER. I met him at Craig Hospital after we were both injured. My car crash. His boat crash. And we became friends right away. It’s hard not to bond with people who are going through very similar situations, especially when you’re just down the hall from each other for 3 months.

He was one of the guys who were concerned and encouraging, and I think they all looked at me as the “little sister.” I was the only girl, and I had my own dynamic among the boys. As a group, we always laughed, and laughter is a powerful thing when things seem to be falling apart.

His family is awesome. His wife, Amie, and kiddos were regulars at Craig Hospital, of course. His youngest boy had a scooter, and the nurses weren’t too thrilled that he liked to ride it in the hallways. I never cared; he was a kid. Let him have some fun. And I remember the first day I saw his cousin. It was definitely a “wow” moment. (I can’t believe I had such a crush, ha!)

Over the years, John and I have kept in touch pretty regularly. There are times when we go a few months between phone calls, but when we do talk, it’s the same ole John. He still teases me, still asks about boyfriends, still wonders about my injury and any changes. He is one of those people I can talk to all day about being handicap, but never actually feel handicap around. There aren’t many people I can say that about. Maybe because he has been there for the entire “ride,” and we saw each other when we were new to this. Maybe because he understands that being normal is important to me. He gets me that way.

I am so glad I got to see him. I actually thought I was going to cry when I saw him walking up (he regained a lot of function post-injury, and you’d never realize just by looking at him that he was at one time in a wheelchair!). He looks so healthy and happy and tall and just John. Even his teasing about my lip ring was worth it.

I forgot how much I missed him.

sidenote:  He is also the one who always calls me “Little Carrie,” which led to the new “Dear little Carrie” series. So, thanks John.

September 14, 2011

Sunny Side Down

Screw California
and that Infiniti.
Its silver doesn’t suit you the way I do.
Come back to where it’s a highway, not a freeway,
to where we drink pop, not soda.
The sun doesn’t glisten off the width of the ocean
but you’ve never seen a lake like Perry.

Screw California
and those big Redwood trees.
A tree you can’t climb is no good.
Come back to my sunflowers and corn fields wide,
to where lightning bugs have become a sport too.
Your winter isn’t quite so cold
but what is Christmas without snow?

Screw California
and all those glittery Hollywood lights.
You can’t see the stars the way I do at night.
Come back to the stickiness of my summer,
to where mosquitoes feast at dusk.
You say you don’t like our flavorless plane
but those Rockies are what keep me from you.

Screw California
and your sunny city.
I need you here.
This is home.

September 13, 2011

whispers go a long way.

I feel like I have said everything
that can possibly be said.

So now
I’m working with
the quiet.

September 12, 2011

a week in pictures.

It was a good week and weekend. Busy and full of projects because I didn’t feel too well. Ribbon wreath for Lindsay’s new baby, friendship bracelet for Kendall (the first niece to get one), 2012 binded planner, painting the SMASH book, blogging, and messiness. Love it.

September 11, 2011


September 6, 2011

sky light.

Clouds in the sky, dripping rain
next to an easy lemon sun.

Only here
could the weather
so resemble life,
changing at every new glance.

I’m still looking
for that rainbow.

September 4, 2011

oh yes.

September 3, 2011

Dear little Carrie,

Sweet little innocence shines in your eyes
and that smile won’t fade for years.

In so many ways, you’ll stay the same
and in so many, you won’t.

Either way,
you’re going to be just fine.

September 2, 2011

simple pleasures.

+ A good book
+ Iced coffee
+ Sharpie pens
+ Sleeping in
+ Lightning at night
+ Sweet text messages
+ Lunch dates with friends
+ A new Moleskine journal
+ Dreams that feel so real
+ Inside jokes
+ Bokeh/depth of field photography
+ Strawberry Chapstick
+ Quick-drying nail polish
+ Clear, breezy nights
+ Soft songs
+ Conversations in the dark
+ Laughing
+ Blueberry muffins
+ DIY projects

September 1, 2011


+ Life seems to get busier by the day. It’s sort of crazy how time is flying by…so often I think “holy crap! I’m really 26!”

+ Nothing seems so bad when I am listening to a Disney song. Really, how do they do that!? (Oo-de-lally is my fav.)

+ If dried cranberries had more calories, I’d have no problem gaining and keeping weight. I love those things.

+ I’ve had a really hard time sleeping lately. And when I do, I have nightmares. Weird ones. If it’s stress, let’s hope things slow down soon!

+ I used to take pretty pictures and then put pretty words with them, inspired by them. I have sort of fallen off that train, and I need to get another ticket.

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