Archive for December, 2012

December 31, 2012

goodbye 2012.

You were good to me. You had some rough patches and sad days and you took a few swipes at our strength, but you taught us things that otherwise we wouldn’t have learned and made us appreciate things we wouldn’t have appreciated. You made us look around and think “Yes, I can do this.”

Favorite things about 2012:
+ Project Life
+ Engagement
+ Lake weekends
+ Colorado
+ Arctic Cat
+ Quiet days of writing
+ Love

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Looking forward to 2013!

December 27, 2012

4 months to go.

I can’t believe it’s so close. And getting closer.

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Dress is ordered. Caterer is booked. Lace (for decor) is here, and invitations are getting close to being printed. Found someone we trust for the cake.

*sigh*

It’s getting there, but the next four months are going to be busy and stressful. And exciting too.

Wish me luck.

December 25, 2012

merry christmas.

Christmas is here!
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Today: I’ll be at Grant and Shannon’s house to celebrate with Greg’s family. Looking forward to many, many laughs. I hope you all have somewhere safe and warm to spend your holiday with family.

December 23, 2012

kaden.

How adorable is this kid?

Love him.
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December 20, 2012

starting over.

I have a friend. A smart, funny, energetic, and generous soul who is an amazing mom to her kids, friend to the undeserving, and grateful for even the rough things she has encountered in life.

She continues to have faith, a deep-seeded sweet faith, that even the worst of people are going to come around in the end and realize that the world doesn’t have to be so bitterly angry. She gives the most disrespectful people the benefit of the doubt, and she refuses to let someone else’s negativity be the reason for any change in herself.

But she has given up on love.

After two serious failed relationships, she has become closed off and content with being alone, with being both the mother and father to her kids. More than anything I think she is afraid of what a third broken heart would feel like and what it would do to the person she is. I think she is afraid it will suck some of her strong and stubborn sweetness and replace it with bitterness.

Somewhere, someone is looking for someone like her and waiting to prove her wrong. I can only hope that person finds her whole, and that he proves to her that love is more than just waiting for the wrong thing to happen, the wrong turn to come.

People who deserve love aren’t always the ones who make it easy to let it into their hearts.

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December 19, 2012

sadness around here.

Two of our police officers were murdered this past weekend (between 7 and 8 on Sunday evening) while answering a suspicious vehicle call. I say murdered because that is exactly what it was. Violent and unnecessary. One of the officers, Dave Gogian, was the father of a guy I have known since high school, Brandon, who also happens to be a police officer on the Topeka Police Department. Xander, Brandon’s best friend, is also an officer. I could keep listing friends who serve, but I’ll just say that when I heard that 2 officers were shot, my heart sank. The likelihood that I knew one or both of them was pretty good.

I heard who they were before the news had released names (news travels fast in this circle), and that fear that I knew them was confirmed. I knew it wasn’t good. I knew that with the wounds I heard they had, that the probability of them pulling through was scarce. Bulletproof vests wouldn’t have mattered in this case for either of them. It knew all of that, but the news that Dave had died still hit me hard and physically ached.

I have needed a few days to process the incredible sadness that I feel about it – for Brandon and his family, the other officer’s family, and our community. These were men who served us, protected us, and helped us. Their families sent them to work that night, never imagining that they would be burying them six days later. It’s just so sad. I have cried, and now I’m angry. The man who shot them was later found (after 3 houses were raided), and 12 hours after he shot two men dead, he was dead also. Bad things shouldn’t happen to good people, and bad people shouldn’t be able to take good people from us.

The past few months have been trying, with too many deaths to people we know and care about. Too many of us asking “why?”

Here’s to hoping 2013 is better for us.

December 18, 2012

december daily: update 2.

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This is fun, and a welcomed change of pace from Project Life, which I’ll be honest about. I’m getting a little burnt out on. It is becoming more of a chore as the year comes to a close. While I want to document all of 2013 because there are big changes coming, I don’t know that I have it in me.

Anyway, DD. I am loving it still, and while I’m not doing every single day, I am getting the important stuff in there. It doesn’t all have to do with Christmas or the holidays, and that’s okay with me. My whole month of December doesn’t normally revolve around those things anyway.

Looking forward to the next 2 weeks of loveliness for this book.
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December 17, 2012

pink – try

December 16, 2012

craig at christmas.

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December 15, 2012

life is squares: road trip to craig.

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Mom and I took a short road trip last week back to Craig Hospital in Denver to pick up my new power chair, and it was, in one word, exhausting. We drove all day Tuesday, had appointments and chair evaluations all day Wednesday and Thursday morning, then headed back home. The chair is similar to the one I currently have, with a few differences. The main one is the width. It’s a few inches wider, and it might pose a few problems with doorways and such. Ugh, I hope not.

I am excited about ordering a new manual wheelchair though. I’ve never had a manual chair that actually fits me. Believe me, it makes a huge difference on pushing around your body weight when something is set up the way it should be. I’ll be getting a TiLite Aero Z chair, in flat black. I could have gone with pretty and flashy colors, but really, that isn’t me. The black is good–and flat black is even better. It should be here around March, I’m guessing.

I had never been to Craig Hospital around Christmas. It’s almost always warm when we plan our trips, so seeing snow and Christmas lights was a welcome sight. So pretty. As good as it was to see a few of my favorite people there, I was more than happy to come home. I wanted to be close to home, to my family, to Greg. Craig always makes me appreciate how far life has progressed since I was a newly injured patient, and it always makes me want to soak the goodness in my life so much more.

With that quick visit and the horrible things that have happened to those children in Connecticut, it makes you want to hold the good things close.

December 13, 2012

today I know

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+ I need to be stronger sometimes. I get too emotional.

+ Stress is not a good look for me, or the bags under my eyes.

+ February 18 is going to be a rough day. Darcy will be having surgery, and I’ll be right there.

+ Dreaming of my dress all day might not be productive, but I can’t help it. Lace
Love. Wedding!

+ I need a break. The day to myself, for sure. That won’t happen until well into January, I’m sure.

+ I cannot wait to be back home.

December 12, 2012

winter.

I clench my jaw,
hoping to still the shake
in the remainder of my body,
a constant frightened shiver
that agonizes on without intervention.
Winter is waging in full force this morning,
temperatures at the bottom
and a matching wind to stab
at my stinging weak fingers.

We need to migrate for the winter,
somewhere the sun can thaw
my poor cold-leaden body.

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December 12, 2012

Craft show.

My first craft show purely a learning experience. There are so many things I will do differently next time. So mant things that would make it better.

Display. I didnt have anything that was spectacular as a display this time around. I wasn’t really sure how the tables were set up or where we would be placed or how the flow was going to go, so I wasn’t really sure how to
put things in my mind so that it made sense. I ended up placing cards around as display cards while the real cards were flat in their plastics sleeves. Not the best to see them.

Ask questions of the organizers. Like I said, I wasn’t clear on how this whole thing was going to work, and that’s my fault for allowing myself to be in the dark. Next time they are going to be sick of emails, I’m sure.

Prepare everything before the week of the show. I’ve been busy. That’s obvious, but I wish I had given myself more time to prepare. I had cards and stamps ready, but the quote prints (be looking for them in my Etsy soon) I wanted had not arrived. I was slightly bummed because they are really cute! It was my own fault though. I thought I had given myself plenty of time when I had them printed, but I was wrong. They didn’t arrive until Monday, two days after I needed them to be there.

It was a fun day, despite selling very little. My sister-in-law and brother kept me laughing, and the day went by surprisingly quick. And Kendall. She just cracks me up. For a five-year-old, she is so witty.

Looking forward to the next one.

Today: My mom and I are at Craig picking up my new chair. I’m wanting to go home already. This place isn’t for me this week.

December 8, 2012

Raelyn’s birthday party

Raelyn’s birthday is next week, but her party was Thursday at Going Bonkers. That place is a kid heaven. Arcade games and a big jungle gym type set up to play. Plus pizza and ice cream and bright colors everywhere.

Fun. I was surprised that it wasn’t busier even though it was a school night. Surprised and relieved. I don’t like feeling like I might accidentally run over little toes.
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December 7, 2012

december daily

decdailyThis is a fun book. Quick and easy, and I really like that I want it to be messy. I see so many beautiful DD books online, and I just can’t do that. Mine needs to be messy, and the pictures need to be a little bit crooked to truly be ME.

For as much as I like simplicity and organization, it doesn’t make much sense, I know.

My only problem with the daily thing is that my days are quite a lot the same, especially during the week. I go to work, come home, and mess around til its time for me to crash. I’m so boring. Trying to find the one thing in the everyday that is different is going to be my challenge.
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December 6, 2012

life in squares: on the farm

mosaic3d5f9b2eda51c38225048bd6aadba6e525e9d6bcWe spent our Sunday afternoon at Tim’s house for Caleb and Payden’s birthday party, and then for some gun-shooting down by the pond (or mud puddle as it should be called lately). We always have such fun times when we’re shooting. Laughing and cutting up with each other. I love it. And I’m getting pretty good at shooting too.

Since winter is coming, there won’t be many more shooting sessions this year, unless the weather stays crazy weird and warm like it has been. I mean, 70s in December? I don’t get it.

December 5, 2012

christmas cards 2012.

Christmas cards this year were easy. Easy in the sense that I knew I wanted something simple, easy, small, and us. Greg is very much like me in that he doesn’t like a whole lot of stuff going on. He trusts me with our paper projects (cards, invites, etc.), and I love him for that. So I knew he would like the same thing as me.
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I designed the front in October and forced myself to wait until around Thanksgiving to print onto the 5×7 kraft paper from Paper Source. I cannot be the only one obsessed with kraft paper for just about every single thing. I love it. It’s beautiful.

I folded and used washi tape to put our Christmas picture (actually it’s a leftover picture–my favorite ever–from this summer) to the inside. The envelopes had to be red, because red screams Christmas, red is Christmas. I stamped an Amy Tangerine stamp on the back, and used green washi to close.
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I love the way they turned out. Can’t wait to get them out in the mail, and into the hands of our favorite people.
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p.s. These cards are also available in my Etsy shop, if you should happen to love them too!
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December 4, 2012

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This little girl is smart and sweet and funny. She has the personality the size of the Milky Way. And a prissy attitude to match. Her imagination never ceases to amaze me, and her smile can melt my heart. She loves Chapstick and to have her nails painted, but she’s the cutest thing in her tiny Carhartt bibs too. She’s much like a Sour Patch kid. Tough and salty when she needs to be, but sweet and soft on the inside.

She turns 3 in a few days, and I can’t life without her. She’s a challenge, but she’s worth it. I can’t wait to see where life takes her or how she wrangles it.

December 3, 2012

december goals.

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December is going to be busy and hectic and fun. So much red and green and stripes and love. I can’t wait.

+ order wedding gown
+ have a good craft show
+ figure out timeline for wedding day
+ print invites
+ Christmas!